Navigating Holiday Triggers: Understanding the Challenges and Finding Hope
The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration. However, for many people, this period can also be a source of significant stress and emotional turmoil. Understanding why the holidays can be so triggering is crucial to developing strategies for coping and finding moments of peace and happiness.
Why Are the Holidays So Triggering?
1. High Expectations:
The media and societal norms often set high expectations for the holiday season, portraying it as a perfect, magical time. This can create pressure to live up to these ideals, leading to stress and disappointment when reality falls short.
2. Family Dynamics:
Family gatherings can bring unresolved conflicts and tensions to the surface. Being in close quarters with relatives for extended periods can reignite old issues and create a challenging emotional environment.
3. Financial Stress:
The holidays often come with increased financial burdens due to gift-giving, travel, and hosting events. This financial strain can exacerbate anxiety and stress, particularly for those already struggling financially.
4. Loneliness and Grief:
For those who have lost loved ones or are isolated from family and friends, the holidays can intensify feelings of loneliness and grief. Memories of happier times can contrast sharply with present circumstances, deepening feelings of sadness.
5. Disruption of Routine:
The holiday season often involves changes in routine, such as travel, parties, and irregular schedules. These disruptions can be unsettling, especially for those who rely on structure to manage their mental health.
6. Cultural and Social Pressures:
Cultural and social expectations to participate in holiday traditions and festivities can feel overwhelming. This can be particularly challenging for those who do not celebrate holidays for personal, religious, or cultural reasons, leading to feelings of exclusion or guilt.
Strategies for Coping with Holiday Triggers
1. Set Realistic Expectations:
Recognize that the perfect holiday portrayed in the media is not realistic. Set achievable goals and focus on what truly matters to you, rather than trying to meet external expectations.
2. Plan Ahead:
Anticipate potential stressors and plan how to handle them. For example, set a budget for gifts and activities, and create a schedule that includes downtime to relax and recharge.
3. Practice Self-care:
Prioritize self-care by engaging in activities that promote your well-being. This can include exercise, meditation, reading, or spending time in nature. Make time for yourself amidst the holiday chaos.
4. Establish Boundaries:
Set boundaries with family and friends to protect your mental and emotional health. This might involve limiting the time spent at gatherings or declining certain invitations.
5. Seek Support:
Reach out to supportive friends, family members, or mental health professionals if you're feeling overwhelmed. Talking about your feelings can help you process them and find solutions.
6. Focus on the Positive:
Look for moments of joy and connection, no matter how small. Engage in activities that bring you happiness and focus on creating positive memories.
Finding Hope and Joy
Despite the challenges, the holiday season also presents opportunities for joy and connection. In a companion blog post, "Embracing the Holidays: The Power of Savouring and Glimmers in Challenging Times," we explore how practices like savouring and seeking "glimmers" can help you find moments of happiness and peace, even during difficult times.
By focusing on these small yet powerful moments, you can enhance your well-being and navigate the holidays with greater ease and happiness. Read more about savouring and glimmers on our page.
Understanding why the holidays can be triggering and learning strategies to cope can help you manage stress and find joy during this season. Remember, it's okay to set boundaries, prioritize self-care, and seek support. Embrace the moments of joy and connection, and allow yourself to fully appreciate the positive aspects of this special time of year.
National Alliance on Mental Illness. (2021). Managing mental health during the holiday season. Retrieved from https://www.nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/November-2021/Managing-Mental-Health-During-the-Holiday-Season
Smith, J. A. (2018). Family dynamics and holiday stress: Strategies for coping. Journal of Family Psychology, 32(4), 456-465. https://doi.org/10.1037/fam0000389
Williams, C. (2019). Financial stress during the holidays: Understanding and managing. Journal of Financial Counseling and Planning, 30(3), 307-319. https://doi.org/10.1891/1052-3073.30.3.307
About the Author
Emily Bushell, M.A. Counselling Psychology
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Registered Counselling Therapist, Canadian Certified Counsellor Supervisor & EMDRIA Approved Consultant | Practice Owner & Clinical Director
Emily Bushell is a Registered Counselling Therapist who is passionate about fostering resilience and wellness with her clients. Emily believes that all people are capable of achieving stability and growth in their lives. Before becoming a founding member of our Wholetherapy Private Therapy Practice, Emily worked as a Clinical Counsellor with Coast Mental Health and as a Concurrent Disorders Specialist with Fraser Health Authority in British Columbia. Emily worked in a variety of settings in the mental health system including treatment centres, outreach teams, methadone clinics and outpatient care. Upon moving home to Nova Scotia, Emily decided to open her own private practice in order to work with her community from a different perspective.
